Yesterday was Day 2 of my head-first dive into what anxiety patients nickname the types of drugs I was prescribed, "Benzos". Benzodiazepines are doctor-prescribed drugs for reducing stress and anxiety, promoting calmness, relaxation and sleep and as anti-depressants. A few examples of Benzodiazepines are: estazolam (ProSom), flurazepam (Dalmane), quazepam (Doral), temazepam (Restoril) and triazolam (Halcion), alprazolam (Xanax), chlordiazepoxide (Librium), clorazepate (Tranxene), diazepam (Valium), halazepam (Paxipam), lorazepam (Ativan), and clonazepam (Klonopin). These drugs, according to multiple websites and confessions of many folks that have taken them state that taking them on a dialy basis is not a good idea. And if you are taking them on a daily basis, do NOT take them for more than 4 months at a time.
The two Benzos I was given was Klonopin 1mg. as a twice a day regime and Xanax for an "as needed" basis. I have yet to take any of the Xanax 0.5mg. as I know from experience what that drug does to me. Basicly, lethargic all day and if I wind up falling asleep, I am in such a deep sleep, I wind up urinating wherever I am sleeping. This, obviously not a wanted, or particularly boost to ones self-esteem whose self-esteem is suffereing to begin with.
As Loyda and Kimmie were out on the town doing some errands yesterday, I was going through a game with Ryan, teaching him things about the game what would allow him to have a little more fun while playing it. I had been feeling pretty drunk all day after taking the Klonopin, stumbling over everything and nearly losing my balance when I stood up from a chair or turned around quickly. And when have you folks ever known me to do anything slow? =)
Just out of the blue, I felt a little sleepy and closed my eyes and layed my head back and rested it on the back of the chair when I got an instant and uncontrollable urge to vomit. I ran into the bathroom and did just that. I came back into the bedroom and lied down. Having a helluva time to keep the room from spinning around as if I had drank 3/4 of a fifth of Canadian Mist in High School (remember this Dad? I sure do...), I finally was able to fall alseep for about two hours. When I awoke, I still felt very lethargic and in slow motion but the nauseous feeling had passed.
Today will be my first chance to reintroduce Xanax to my mind and body. I plan on taking a trip to the grocery store after taking Xanax to see if the Xanax will control the anxiety. My hopes is that it wil and if it does not, My hopes are than I can talk myself down into being able to control the severity of the attack be reasoning with myself that this fear is ridiculous and that noone is paying any closer attention to me than I am to them.
Well, I am showered, dressed and looking my pimpest (is this possible?) =) I am heading over to the local Fred Meyer across the street. I took the Xanax about 35 minutes ago and I am giving it a go. I am still in a kind of Slow-motion state from the Klonopin but I think I should be OK. Not being so high strung might be a good thing. Things that normally infuriate me hopefully will roll off my back like water off a ducks back. But we will see soon huh? Wish me luck.
Information on Clonazepam (Klonopin) http://www.rxlist.com/cgi/generic/clonaz.htm
Ðave
PS... Please understand that I am rather innebriated while writing this so typos are most likely going to be common. =)
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1 comment:
I am saying good luck also. Good you are very aware of meds etc. I feel in the long run, between Dr. Kina and you, a perfect combination will occur. Thank God for Dr. Kina sticking with you.
Love, Mom
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